Highly Paid Slave Finally Quits

Randy Black sent in his resignation papers when his company’s financial reports were released last Monday. By overworking himself, he increased the company’s revenues by $1.5 million in the past year. Black has suffered multiple mental breakdowns with the stress from his job. A reporter extracted information from a couple of the company’s employees. One employee said that “Randy always thought he was better than us.” “He deserved everything he has coming to him,” another employee said. One African-American employee believed “Randy has the skills and the network to start his own company. He retained his composure even as a highly paid slave.”

Black was an African-American corporate head in an industry known to be hostile towards African-Americans. Tyler Wood, owner of the company, released a statement on Wednesday about Black’s resignation:

“Randy has decided to leave at a time where we are expanding into 2 new states. I promoted Randy to his new position and this is how he repays me. He was the most dedicated worker and I owe a majority of this company’s success to him. Although I have given my other employees an average raise of 5% per year, he continued to be happy with a 2%. Randy works the hardest and has consistently increased my company’s revenue on average of $1.5 million per year. Randy is making a huge mistake by leaving this company. Sherry, his wife, will most likely leave him in the next 2 years.”

Black was not immediately available for interview, since he was undergoing surgery to get his testosterone levels back to normal. Black, 28, also suffered from psychological stress due to racism.

“Weeks ago I noticed that my husband started acting differently. He seemed to come home depressed more times than he came happy. His sex drive became pretty much non-existent. The energy dispense by him has been complete negativity.” Sherry told reporters while leaving the huge mansion the two live in together. Her husband insured her he was okay while his actions spoke otherwise. “Eventually, I convinced Randy to go to the doctor for a check up,” Sherry said.

The results were shocking. Racism sapped the testosterone from Black’s body. With no testosterone, Black felt like a boy instead of a man. The doctors told Black that he has to get out of that environment. Sapping Black’s testosterone, being a highly paid slave was what he had become. Drawing on the advice of people closest to him, he decided to put in his resignation.

We caught up with Black this past Friday. “Now that my surgery is complete, I feel better than ever,” Black said. “The environment reduced me to a little boy inside instead of allowing me to grow. Tyler has paid me millions, but I still felt underpaid compared to my co-workers. With some contacts, I hope to create my own successful business in my own right. My goal is to motivate the younger generation of students to create things of their own and not .”

Black continued while walking towards his Rolls-Royce Wraith, “Racism taught me first hand that you cannot expect to walk into someone’s arena and expect respect. I plan to mentor students who have no idea what business ownership and entrepreneurship is about. I teach my kids to never become a highly paid slave. Owners receive the benefits, while the workers struggle. You make $250,000 per year, but how much value is your company receiving.”

“These days no one is talking about these topics. Kids struggle in school, while not knowing how to provide for their families. A job is one way to provide, but shouldn’t be the main focus. Your employer decides who can be laid off or fired. Today you work, tomorrow you pack. In every industry, this is happening, wake up,” Black said.


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